A tree transformed

And cozy Christmas feelings

Last night we spent hours decorating the Christmas tree (mostly me) and putting up flashing white pepper lights (entirely my husband’s creation). As usual, while draping strings of tinsel and fiddling around with a multitude of lights that had got themselves twisted, memories of past Christmases burst in on me. This always happens - the season is so unbearably tinged with nostalgia, and for me, family who are not with us. It is a pleasant feeling but at the same time, uncomfortable. I remember my father’s ringing voice at the dinner table (ringing even louder after a few drinks). I remember so many things.

I think a lot of people feel that way about Christmas, but quietly, because one is supposed to throw oneself into the merriment; but especially as one grows older it becomes more acute. Things are missing, that should still be in place.

Be that as it may, the tree looks rather splendid; a better effort than last year. The added vibrancy is due to some more lights, from my late mother in law’s collection. She had bags full of them, which we have now inherited. The lights are mostly made up of the Rastafari colours - red, gold and green. Rastafarians celebrate Christmas on January 7.

Among the decorations are some very old ones that I inherited years ago. They are small, and seem to be handmade, and are sprayed with gold glitter paint, which is wearing off. I think next year I will give them a little respray. They are old-fashioned. I love anything old-fashioned at Christmas time.

We also have some European-style decorations, which my friend Suzanne gave me a few years ago. They are not shiny, but very sweet and traditional.

I do wish we had some more big, shiny balls though. I am going to raid the nearest pharmacy and buy some. At a hotel gift shop of all places, I bought a gorgeous one last year, along with one in the Jamaican flag colours: gold, green, black.

Now, a “cold front” is here and a feisty wind has been blowing all day. This evening is quite cool (by “cool” I mean 26 degrees Celsius, which may not be cool to some). So, we have switched to a Christmas mood.

Despite the uncomfortable twinges mentioned above, we are determined to enjoy it this year.

Our Christmas tree and flashing window.